Here's the setting: You just arrived home after saving a country from an evil mastermind hell-bent on taking over their supply of chewing gum and using it to create mayhem. During that time, however, you missed your Cinematical and all the stuff that happened during the week. Well, you showed up at just the right time -- may we now present [drum roll please] ... Cinematical's Stuff That Happened This Week!

Fanboy Stuff
Kenneth Branagh is Directing Thor
Transformers 2 is Shooting in IMAX
Eagle Eye Writer Wants to Make a Blade Runner 2?
Zack Snyder Talks 300 Sequel
But Then Jon Favreau Talks Iron Man Sequel
Check Out Early Art for Pixar's The Incredibles
Star Wars Steampunk and Reservoir Dogs = Hella Cool!
Are They Rebooting Daredevil?

Exclusive Stuff
Bolt Poster Premiere
Pray the Devil Back to Hell Poster Premiere
Clip from Bill Maher's Religulous

Stuff to Talk About
Will Smith vs Will Smith
Five People Who Should Star in PG Porn
Who's More Uncomfortable with Onscreen Nudity?
Which Upcoming Marvel Film Shows the Most Promise?
How Saw V Could Actually Be Good
Is Roku's Netflix Player Tempting You Yet
When Talking Animals Attack
Horror Remakes That Don't Suck

Reviews and Stuff
How to Lose Friends and Alienate People
Beverly Hills Chihuahua
Religulous
Rachel Getting Married
Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist
Flash of Genius
Appaloosa
An American Carol
Indie Spotlight: New Releases for Oct. 3

More stuff after the jump ...

I grew up reading Charlotte's Web and watching Mister Ed and the Francis (the Talking Mule, with Donald O'Connor) movies on TV, so I have a very warm spot in my heart for talking animals. They can inspire wondrous flights of fantasy, lift the spirits with good-natured humor, and lead to a deep and abiding respect for nature and the environment.

Of course, watching the Yogi Bear cartoons once made me think I could take on a black bear foraging for food at our family's camping site in Yellowstone National Park -- I was six years old and had to be physically restrained -- so I can see the down side as well. Still, dozens of animated films have made it abundantly clear that it's possible to lend human voices to the animal kingdom without dumbing the material down to idiocy and, when done right (Babe, Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey, Joe's Apartment), live-action talking animals also deserve to be a treasured part of our cinematic heritage.

But not these. Here are seven (mostly) live-action movies featuring talking animals that attack our sense of what makes a movie good.

7. Underdog (2007)

When Hollywood screws around with my cherished childhood memories, I strain to give them the benefit of the doubt. There's no excuse, though, for this abomination of a movie. I realize that Wally Cox's dweeby voice would be impossible for someone else to replicate, but Jason Lee? Really?! A huge chunk of the original cartoon's charm was the very simple (cheap) animation, which relied upon the writers to come up with witty things for the actors to say. None of that was transplanted to the live-action movie and I can't imagine any children looking back fondly upon this version of Underdog in the future.

Who doesn't love pie? And more importantly, who doesn't love pie in the face? Well, as long as it's not YOUR face. (Though of course you can balance out the humiliation of being served -- so to speak -- with the knowledge that what you were being served was dessert goodness.)

The history of pie-fighting in movies is vast and varied, ranging from the simple to the sublime. Oh heck, who am I kidding? It's all just a messy, slapstick good time. Take a look at these famous movie pie fights, and then let us know: What's your favorite? Which ones did we miss? If you were to get hit in the face with a pie, what type would you prefer? And ... are you hungry yet?

(As a way of welcoming my very favorite month of the year, I thought it would be fun to reprint one of the very few good articles I've ever written. So here it is!)

By: Scott Weinberg

House of Wax, starring Paris Hilton. The Fog, starring Wooden Superman. The Amityville Horror, starring Van Wilder.

Yep, it's tough to be an old-school hardcore horror fan these days, what with all the really atrocious remakes that keep flopping off of the studios' assembly lines. (If you paid money to see When a Stranger Calls, you're either one devoted horror fan -- or a really bored high school kid.) But since the Horror Fan is nothing if not loyally optimistic, we trudge off to each successive remake with a small kernel of hope -- maybe this one won't suck the proverbial egg. So while it's perfectly logical for a passionate horror geek to throw up his/her hands and shriek "Ack! Horror remakes! They all suck!!" -- the simple truth is that they don't all suck. The good ones are just pretty darn few and far between.

7. Night of the Living Dead (1990)-- Splatter-master Tom Savini got the chance to direct his own remake of Romero's all-time classic back in 1990, and -- whaddaya know? -- he did a pretty solid job of it! With extra gore dripping from the floorboards and the presence of genre favorites Tony Todd & Bill Moseley, this re-visit came long before the Remake Renaissance, but I think it still holds up pretty well today.

It is inevitable -- any form of art will, at some point, turn inwards. Instead of focusing on other forms of life, the form will attempt to reveal itself -- whether exploratory and serious or sarcastic and mocking. In Hollywood, the camera has spun inwards countless times. Sometimes it's earnest, but most often it's a great serving of satire and irony.

There are a ton of great examples of this, from Boogie Nights to Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, Strange Brew to The Big Lebowski. If I had 50 slots, I could make this comprehensive, but I only have seven. So you're getting the best mock-filled flicks of this century -- films ranging from the year 2000 all the way to 2008. Check them out after the jump, and weigh in with your picks below.

WARNING: The following videos are NSFW. They contain, among other things, violence and foul language. Watch at your own risk.

You could probably tell if you got me on the phone: I had some severe oral surgery just a few days ago. It was a long time coming (stemming from a genetic calcium deficiency, a nasty fall during Labor Day weekend, and years of simple stupidity on my part), it was very unpleasant, and ... it's over. Aside from the healing process, that is, which is often more uncomfortable than the actual procedures. (If you're reading these words, go brush your teeth right now. Seriously. I'll wait.) So since I'll be spending the next several days drinking soup and popping cocktails made of Vicodin and antibiotics, I'll also need a big stack of "comfort movies" to make me feel better. And to make myself feel even better than that, I choose to share those movies with you.

So if you're low, cranky, depressed, ill, miserable, or simply recovering from a dental procedure that makes Marathon Man look like Mr. Mom, try some of these on for size. Odds are you've seen 'em already, but each one has some sort of magical healing power that I'm very grateful for.

Finding Nemo -- This is my #1. Whenever I can't sleep, have a headache, or am convalescing from endodontic agony, there's just something so sweetly soothing about this movie. Perhaps the underwater locale has something to do with it, but Finding Nemo always chills me out. And if you've ever met me, you know how valuable a movie like that can be. I even like the dentist, and that's saying something.

The Fellowship of the Ring -- The early stuff in Hobbiton is so damn beautiful ... and that music! Plus, the idea of starting off on a VERY long adventure reminds me of watching movies as a kid (when every movie seemed four hours long), and that's a very valuable power for a movie to possess.

The Princess Bride -- 'Nuff said.

Look, I'm thinking the same thing you are: Here comes Hollywood to screw up another one of our beloved franchises by re-imagining it for this new, hip generation. Whenever they try to mess with nostalgia, it always comes back to bite them in the ass -- but could things be different with a franchise like Ghostbusters, which gave us two films ... and, let's admit it, only one real classic? Here are five ways to make a cool Ghostbusters sequel ...

1. Get the Apatow crew involved

When you look back at the original Ghostbusters, you see names like Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Rick Moranis and Ivan Reitman. Back in 1984, these were the folks who made us really laugh. These were the young-ish voices of the time; the guys you wanted to pay money to see because you knew they'd be worth it. Today, the same can be said for guys like Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, Jason Segel, Steve Carell, Jay Baruchel, Jonah Hill, Michael Cera and Craig Robinson. At least a few of those names should show up in the sequel in order for it to have a really good shot of succeeding with fans.

2. Get a director who understands the franchise (ie: Harold Ramis or Ivan Reitman)

While there's a very good chance we'll end up seeing Judd Apatow's name tossed around as producer (no way he's directing this), the best way to hold on to what we love about Ghostbusters is to bring on a man who was there for the first two and knows what, exactly, makes this franchise work. Ramis has been working with the Apatow clan a lot lately (directing Year One, appeared in both Knocked Up and Walk Hard), and is perfectly capable of directing and acting in a film (Hello Egon cameo!). He'd by my choice for this, and, I'm sure, will also lend his voice to the script.

Before I talk about a "guilty pleasures" list, I'll start with the same disclaimer that everyone starts with when they talk about a "guilty pleasures" list: When it comes to entertainment, there shouldn't be any such thing as a guilty pleasure. If something is bad in an entertaining way, and you enjoy it, then so what? Just because you're enjoying it for reasons other than what the filmmaker intended (e.g., laughing at a movie that was supposed to be scary) doesn't mean you need to feel guilty about it. Now, if you tried to convince people that the movie is good -- not so-bad-it's-good, but actually GOOD -- well, then maybe your friends would question your taste. But hey, don't feel guilty. Let your freak flag fly!

Now then. The handsome devils at Moviefone asked readers what their favorite guilty pleasures are, and what do you know, the readers gave them some. Most of the nominated titles are ones that very few people would defend as being legitimately good, but that apparently lots of people are able to enjoy for other reasons: Battlefield Earth (pictured), Crossroads, Coyote Ugly, etc.

Having recently re-watched Anaconda for research purposes (really!), I agree with its inclusion on the list. It fails utterly at what it was trying to do, but it sure makes me laugh, particularly Jon Voight's campy performance that sounds like Christopher Walken mixed with Zorro.

The readers offer explanations for their choices, too. For example, on Howard the Duck, "Lisa41794" says, "Lea Thompson and alien duck have sex. What's more entertaining than that ... lol." What's more entertaining than that lol indeed, Lisa41794!

Check out the list and photo gallery to see what else made the list. And feel free to tell us what your favorite guilty pleasures are in the comments below.

It's difficult (and a little silly) to try and judge an entire quarter-year's movies in one lump sum -- but that's what we seem to do at the end of every Summer Movie Season. That's when all our excitement, expectations, and final reactions come colliding together and we find ourselves thinking: "Was I actually looking forward to that piece of crap for four months?" But to me, each summer is like a walk through a carnival: Some of the attractions dazzle me, others simply don't interest me, and a few are just a waste of tickets. But once early May rolls around, I'm always ready for another trip to the Hollywood Movie Carnival. (It's where you find all the tentpoles!)

So while I'm elated to greet the upcoming season of "prestige movies," there's little denying that we've had one hell of a good summer, cinematical-ly speaking. I'm not talking about box office grosses, because frankly that stuff is so unimportant. What matters is that we got some good flicks, a few pieces of mindless (yet well-made) popcorn adventures, and even a few great films that will enjoy a very long shelf life. So while I'm not exactly sure that 2008 represents the finest Summer Movie Season of all time, I'd definitely say it was more good than bad. But if you can think of a summer that was better than this one, you know where to throw your comments. (In the comments section.)

Just attempting to make a small list of any large field of film will immediately invoke dissatisfaction. It doesn't matter if you cloak it in your own personal favorites, or try to narrow it down to a specific theme. Someone, somewhere will say you're missing X, or have forgotten Y. I get that, and I try not to be one of those people when I scoff at lists I don't agree with.

But sometimes it's just inevitable, especially when the lists talk about super-loved geek fare or cult favorites. Both have die-hard fans, and when it comes to the cult genre, it's fans who adore and fight for a film without having met seas of marketing and press. The movie itself is what inspires the cult following, rising the film from the forgotten piles of dust and into the never-forgotten ranks of cult infamy.

So I have to say, I'm pretty darned surprised at Entertainment Weekly's The Cult 25: The Essential Left-Field Movie Hits Since '83. (It's pretty much this list, without the older films.) At the very least, they narrowed the time frame down, but as soon as I saw "essential," I knew there would be holes, and strangely placed films.